The Emotionary No.3 - Playful. A CBT Perspective

Playful

[pley-fuhl] adjective

Playful is like a silver fish - slipping and skitting and splashing. It dives down under as you tread water at the surface, and you wait for it with giggling anticipation. Where will it strike? Your toes, your tummy? You squirm at the thought, as if being tickled. Lose your breath with your laughter. As you wait, the water calms. You look across its clear, still surface. Then, with a pop and a plop, it jumps in front of you, showing off its skills. Glad it made you smile.

Most children are able to play when young but sometimes as we age, we lost touch with the playful side of our lives. Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT) can help to cultivate playfulness by identifying and dismantling rigid or self-critical thoughts that can keep our ‘inner child’ locked away. Often, we resist being playful because we fear looking foolish, failing, or losing control. These are all anxious predictions that CBT actively challenges and helps us to overcome. By recognising the presence of these restrictive patterns, we can reframe playfulness, viewing it not as a waste of time, but as an essential practice for mental flexibility and stress reduction.

CBT uses a combination of cognitive restructuring (changing our thoughts) and behavioural experiments to gently test whether our fears and avoidance of certain situations or activities are genuinely needed. A therapist might encourage us to try a low-stake, lighthearted activity, such as drawing poorly on purpose, playing a children’s board game, or cracking a joke to see if our worst fears actually come true. Almost always, the reality is far less problematic than the picture we have in our head - the world doesn't end and instead, we may experience a sudden burst of joy. Through this process of shifting thoughts and trying new things, CBT helps us to build a safer, more resilient internal space where spontaneous joy, creativity, and playfulness can naturally resurface.